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Sportsmanship

Sportsmanship with Drew Pearson

Daily Dose

Over-scheduling Your kids

1:30 to read

Most schools in my area are starting in the next week or so….which also means after school activities are also getting ready to begin. Is your child going to be over or under scheduled?  It is sometimes difficult to find a happy medium.

 

I am still a big believer in the “one sport” per season rule and one other activity..maybe two if the third activity does not require a weekend game or practice.  So, what does this look like for a child in elementary school….soccer, fall baseball or football for the fall season, as well as girl scouts, boy scouts, debate team, chess team, and then maybe piano or flute lessons?  You can change that up in anyway and substitute dance, gymnastics, volleyball, a foreign language class…but you get the picture. In this way your child should have several days a week with “NOTHING” to do after school…except go outside and play!  This gives the parent or caregiver a break as well from driving all around to transport to the venue for the practice or game.

 

I hear so many complaints from parents who are in a constant state of stress from trying to figure out transportation for their child to the soccer practice that conflicts with the football practice and the lacrosse practice. This also requires trying to  juggle the multiple games on the weekend that go on for hours one after the next, and even on Sunday mornings.  When I hear the parents complain about this ridiculous schedule I am also seeing the children who are over tired, burnt out and may even have stomach aches and headaches due to the stress of being over scheduled.

 

While every parent is well intended and wanting their child to have as many opportunities as possible in both athletic and other extracurricular activities, a parent also needs to sometimes say “no”.  Discussing the logistics as well as the time commitment for each activity, in an age appropriate manner, may help a family decide which activity stays and which one is “punted”.

 

So….sit down before you and your child are overwhelmed and pick the activities that you will do this fall…but leave some room for being bored. Boredom is a noun that we need to hear more often.

 

Daily Dose

Toddlers & Tantrums

1.15 to read

I see toddlers for check ups nearly every day and for both the 15 month and 18 month visit, there are many challenges for parents and the pediatrician (and of course the child). Toddlers are not at what I would call an EASY age.

As you know if you have a toddler, they are quite moody (just wait for teenagers) and they can “stop, drop and roll” into a tantrum in the blink of an eye.  So while I was examining an 18 month old this week ( she is one of three adorable girls), she suddenly became infuriated (her mother and I were really clueless as to what triggered this) and she jumped off of her mother’s lap and fell to the floor kicking and screaming. 

Now, for a first time parent this might be alarming behavior, but for a seasoned mother of three it was really no big deal. Appropriately, we all just ignored her as she laid on the floor and screamed (no, the mother was not worried about germs on the floor either) and we continued our conversation about her child’s less than stellar sleep habits.

After a few minutes her daughter calmed down, the older sisters got her a sticker and she left without a fuss. Her mother had already learned, like we all do, that the best way to stop tantrums is by ignoring them and letting your toddler have some time to “express her emotions” with age appropriate (although inappropriate for older children) behavior.  

Several days later, her mother sent me an email with another picture attached of the same child having yet another tantrum after she found her in her diaper with a sharpie pen happily marking all over herself (the photo above). Of course, the minute she took the marker away her daughter fell to the floor again to express her outrage! So funny that her mom thought to document it and send me another picture.

By the way, she also told me that she had taken practical advice and was working on having her daughter cry herself to sleep and it was working well!  Both the tantrums and sleep were improving by just ignoring her behavior. Back to those laws of natural consequences.  

Daily Dose

Sleep

1:30 to read

Back to school bedtime routines are very important!  Now that kids are having to get up, (often before the sun comes up) going to bed on time makes everyone in the house wake up in a better frame of mind and mood for the day ahead.   

 

Bed time battles are typical for a toddler who has learned to ask for “one more book”, or for the elementary school child who swears “they are not tired” but who falls asleep during bath time.  But who knew there would be even more battles with teens and their electronics??

 

Numerous studies have shown that electronics disrupt sleep.  But, trying to convince your adolescent son or daughter that they need more sleep is a daily struggle. While the studies on sleep recommend that teens get between 8 to 9 hours of sleep, most teens are not even close to that!  (90% report less than 9 hours).

 

During the summer teens keep all sorts of crazy hours and many get the majority of their sleep during what we would consider to be “daytime” hours…as they go to bed at 2 or 3 am and sleep past noon.  So, the minute that school resumes after summer vacation they already have sleep issues trying to “re-adjust” their biological clocks…and then you throw in the use of electronics right before bed and you have the perfect storm for sleep deprivation and daytime fatigue.

 

The American Academy of Sleep Medicine found that “adequate sleep duration on a regular basis leads to improved attention, behavior, learning, memory, emotional regulation, quality of life and mental and physical health”.  There isn’t a parent around who doesn’t want happy, rested, studious and healthy kids…of all ages. If you throw in less moodiness for teens who get more sleep most parents would sign their teens up on the spot.

 

Why do we all need to disconnect from electronics in order to have better sleep?  That blue light from the electronic screen…of any shape for or fashion works against sleep. It signals the brain to suppress melatonin secretion, which is the hormone that makes us get sleepy at the end of the day. The light from the screen also confuses the brain of it being daytime and increases alertness which may delay sleep…even after turning off the screen.

 

Start the school year with the family rule, parents included, that all screens (phones, tablets, computers) will be off and docked outside of the bedroom at least 30-60 minutes prior to bedtime. While your teen may insist that they won’t use the phone, it is often too tempting to not “cheat” once you are in your own room and asleep. 

 

While this may initially be hard to enforce, once it is the family routine it becomes less of a battle. Everyone will have an easier time falling asleep and staying asleep, and maybe get a few more hours of “shut eye”.    

 

 

Daily Dose

Breaking Bad Habits

1:15 to read

Do any of your children bite their nails or suck their thumbs? If so, are you always saying, “take your fingers out of your mouth, they are dirty”, or “if you keep biting your nails you will get sick due to all of those germs on your fingers”!  I was guilty of saying those very things to my own children, and I also remember being a nail biter and my mother saying the same thing to me.

Well, who would have thought that a study just released today in the journal Pediatrics might make us parents eat our own words (it wouldn’t be the first time).  The study, “Thumb-Sucking, Nail-Biting and Atopic Sensitization, Asthma and Hay Fever” suggests that “childhood exposure to microbial organisms reduces the risk of developing allergies”.  Who knew that there might be something so positive coming from a “bad habit”.  

This study was done in New Zealand and followed over 1,000 children born between 1972-1973 (dark ages) whose parents reported that they either bit their nails or sucked their thumbs at 5,7,9 and 11 years old. The participants were then checked at ages 13 and again at 32 years old to look for an allergic reaction ( by skin prick testing) against at least one common allergen.  And guess what…at 13 years of age the prevalence of an allergic reaction was lower among those children who HAD sucked their thumbs or bitten their nails.  Incredibly the the findings persisted almost 20 years later!  This study even looked at cofounding factors including sex, parental history of allergies, pet ownership, breast feeding and parental smoking… none of which played a role. 

So, while not advocating for children to suck their thumbs or bite their nails (which unfortunately I did until high school when I decided to have nails to polish) there may be a silver lining….a protective effect against allergies that persists into adulthood. 

Lemonade out of lemons!!!

Daily Dose

Bullying

1:30 to read

Schools around the country are opening their doors as a new school year begins. While excitement and a bit of anxiety are typical emotions for children as they find out their new classes and teachers, there are a group of students who have tremendous anxiety about going back to school….those children who have been victims of bullying.

 

It depends which study you read but somewhere between 10-29% of students report having been bullied. This represents around 13 million kids.  Some studies also show that somewhere around 6-10% of school aged children may be chronic victims of bullying.  No matter the number or statistic, bullying is an ongoing problem among school aged children and may have long last effects on both the child who has bullied as well as for the child who was bullied. 

 

Bullying by definition is “unwanted aggressive behavior among school aged children that involves either a real or perceived power imbalance”. Bullying behaviors are also typically repetitive. Boys are more likely to be bullies and may bully boys or girls while girls tend to bully other girls more often. 

 

There are different types of bullying. It may be physical (not as common), verbal, exclusionary, or cyberbullying.  All of these types of bully behaviors cause psychological and/or physical distress for the victims.  Victims of bullying are more likely to miss school and will have absences for “unknown” reasons where they may just report “not feeling well”.  These children  may often have frequent headaches and stomach aches without any physical findings.  I find that in many cases of bullying a child has been “well all summer” and the physical distress returns once school resumes. Victims of bullying also report difficulty in school with focus and concentration as well as depression and isolation.

 

The majority of bullying takes place at school, especially at times when there may be less supervision by teachers…during recess, lunch time,  bathroom breaks, and on playgrounds.  Unfortunately with the advent of cyberbullying and the use of cell phones, tablets and computers to send mean texts or emails more and more bullying may be occurring outside of school. 

 

Just as teachers need to be aware of bullying at school, parents need to know what their children are doing online. Now is another good time to discuss or re-visit the issue of online bullying and review your own family rules for posting or texting, reminding your child that anything they post may be seen by anyone. Don’t post or send anything to anyone that could hurt or embarrass themselves or others. It just takes one person forwarding a message for it to become “viral” and it will remain in that “mysterious cloud” forever!

 

Prevention of bullying requires that students, teachers, administrators and parents all work together.  Encourage your child to report any bullying behavior or concerns that they have and to get the school year off to a good start. 

 

One last statistic: parents who are involved with their children (including their online lives) and have clear and concise rules are less likely to have children who are either those who bully or are victims of bullying.  

 

  

Daily Dose

Omega-3 Fatty Acids

1:30 to read

Many of the patients that I see who have problems with attention and focus as well as other behavioral and learning issues have been started on all sorts of different medications. For some children their medications seem to be “working well”. But, for some children it has been difficult to find the “right” medication to alleviate all of their symptoms.  Studies have shown that anywhere from 10%- 30% of children with ADHD do not respond favorably to stimulant medications. Therefore,  it is not uncommon for their parents to inquire about the use of alternative or complementary medications. In several cases their parents have already started “dietary supplements”, which at times they are reluctant to admit to, or ask for my opinion.  

Interestingly, there is recent data regarding dietary supplements that parents and pediatricians should be paying attention to…and open to discussing.  A study that was presented last fall at the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry showed that omega-3’s “could augment the response in children aged 7-14 years who were receiving psychotherapy for depression and bipolar disorders”. There have been  studies as well that have shown “significant improvements with Omega-3’s relative to placebo for problems including aggression as well as depression and anxiety symptoms”.  There are also numerous studies looking at ADHD symptom improvement in those using Omega-3’s, and again the results have been mixed, made even more difficult by the fact that ADHD is a subjective diagnosis.  

Another issue that requires more study is how these fatty acids actually work within the body and brain. Omega-3’s are an important building block of the brain and it is present in the brain's cell membranes, where it is thought to facilitate the transmission of neural signals.  Current thought is that these fatty acids may change the cell membrane fluidity and may also have anti-inflammatory effects….but a lot of research continues on the issue of mechanism of action. 

Several of the studies looked at dosage of the Omega 3 fatty acid supplements and “it seemed that there were more positive trials related to higher daily doses of  certain omega 3 fatty acids including eicosapentaenoic acid (EPA) and docosahexanoic acid (DHA).  There need to be further studies to address the amount and ratio of these Omega-3’s as they are used for supplements. 

So while the research continues as to the effectiveness of Omega 3’s on focus, mood, behavior and learning it is important for all children to consume enough Omega-3 fatty acids in their diet. Eating fatty fish a few times a week would be beneficial for the health of all children - and the decision to supplement beyond that may be a topic for discussion with your own physician. 

 

Daily Dose

Toddler Behavior

1.30 to read

Do you have a toddler? If so you are in the throes of some difficult, albeit sometimes funny, yet inappropriate behavior. It happens to every parent...suddenly their precious child turns into Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.  Somewhere around 15-18 months, you will most likely see this change in behavior. Although most books refer to the “terrible twos” I really think it is the “me no wanna” 18-30 month old. 

“Me no wanna” is the phrase we often used around our house, and it was coined when the boys were toddlers. It just seemed like the best line when our sweet toddler would rather have a tantrum than do the simple task that we wanted him to do. Example: please put your toy back in the box. “Me no wanna”, I would prefer to fall to the floor and scream.   

How is it that your typically sweet 20 month old child can be in middle of playing nicely and then suddenly seems possessed as they fling themselves to the floor kicking and screaming?  What is the matter?  Are they having a seizure? Or is it that “something” just didn’t seem right to them and they are angry and frustrated???  How can they change behavior so quickly.?   (hint, foreshadowing for those teen years). 

You never know with a toddler what kind of answer you will get when you say something as easy as “let’s get on your shoes to go outside”. Sometimes they happily run get the shoes, bring them to you, sit down and the shoes go on licitly split.  The next time they get the shoes, throw them across the room, lay on the floor and look at you like “me no wanna”. 

Trust me, you are not a “bad” parent, you are just living through some really challenging parenting. It is exhausting at times, but while this age is typically difficult it is some of your most important parenting. This is really the beginning of behavior modification.  Your brilliant toddler is testing you, this may be the first time you the parents understand why everyone talks about boundaries and consequences. 

Some children also express their “me no wanna” by acting out with hitting, biting and kicking. Again, very inappropriate behavior. Your job is to change that behavior by using time out, or taking away a toy or even putting the child to bed early.. There are so many ways to start letting your toddler know that there are consequences for misbehaving, and that tantrums don’t work. 

I am in throes of “me no wanna” again, only this time it is with a puppy! Seems very similar to me.

Daily Dose

Why Teens Need Curfews

1.00 to read

While talking to a mother of a teenage patient today the discussion of curfews came up. Does your child have one? They should!While talking to a mother of a teenage patient recently, the discussion heated up when we talked about curfews.  I remember growing up with the TV news coming on and saying, "it is 11 o'clock, do you know where your child is?" At the time I just hated that as it reminded my parents (who always watched the news) to come downstairs to make sure that I was home.

Maybe they would have remembered on their own, but I was convinced that it was the news that kept my parents checking on me. At any rate, the point of this is that I had a curfew and that they checked on me, enforced the curfew and there were consequences for not following the rules. So, the mother today was telling me that her son had a curfew (good for her and an appropriate time too) but that he had broken the curfew twice and he was now upset that she had followed through by having him come home earlier and had taken the car away for a week. Her son was angry that she "didn't trust him" anymore, and she explained that she had trusted him, by giving him a car to drive and a time to come home, but that he had broken the trust by not following the curfew. She then explained that he had to re-earn her trust, and he is just baffled by that. She is doing a great job of setting limits and boundaries, but we talked about how hard it is to follow through and not just give in. On the other hand, I also see a lot of parents of teens that do not have curfews for their kids, driving contracts for new drivers, and those who turn their heads when their teens are not making good choices. It is a hard job, but teens need limits, boundaries and consequences, just like when they were toddlers. If you have a teen keep up the good work and remember, it is 11:00 0'clock, do you know where your child is? Do you have a curfew for your teen? Share your comments & feedback. That's your daily dose, we'll chat again tomorrow. Send your question or comment to Dr. Sue!

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